How We Balance Structure & Spontaneity When Traveling with Kids
(A little plan, a little play, and a lot of snacks)
One of the most common questions we get when people see us traveling with our kids is:
“Do you guys actually plan this stuff out? Or just wing it and hope for the best?”
And the honest answer? We do both.
Because here’s the truth: kids are wild cards.
You could have the most perfectly mapped out itinerary, color-coded and backed by TripAdvisor reviews—and one skipped nap or a case of hangry toddler rage can throw the whole day sideways.
But not having a plan? That’s just asking for someone to cry in the parking lot. (And let’s be real—it might be me.)
Over the years, we’ve learned to travel with a loose structure—enough of a plan to guide the day, but enough flexibility to follow the unexpected joy (or tantrum) wherever it leads.
1. We build our days around “anchor activities”
Think of each travel day like a playground. You need posts to hold it up—but you don’t need to plan every move your kids make on the monkey bars.
We usually pick:
One main outing (something that’s exciting, educational, or outdoorsy)
One mealtime that we’re actually excited about (local eats, not drive-thru)
One reset or quiet time (hotel rest, pool time, or just slowing down)
These three “anchors” help keep the day structured without it feeling packed or rushed. If we end up doing more, great! If not, we still feel accomplished.
2. Downtime is non-negotiable
We used to fight this. We'd try to squeeze in "one more thing" or push through exhaustion because we didn’t want to waste a moment. And you know what happened?
Cue tears, tantrums, and parents questioning all their life choices.
Now, we plan downtime in advance.
Sometimes that means a midday break at the hotel. Sometimes it’s letting the kids chill in the stroller with a snack while we sit on a shaded bench for 20 minutes.
Kids need white space, especially in unfamiliar environments. And honestly, so do we.
3. Snacks + buffer time = survival
You already know this, but I’ll say it louder: never underestimate the power of snacks.
Even with a solid plan, we always build in extra time for the inevitable—bathroom breaks, spills, meltdowns, “Mom, I dropped my toy back there!” delays. We aim to be early to everything because if we’re running behind with kids in tow, it can get stressful fast.
Our go-bag always has:
A small first aid kit
Protein snacks and fruit
Water bottles
Wipes
Sticker books, crayons, or something to fidget with
It’s like a diaper bag, evolved.
4. We leave room for random magic
Some of our favorite travel memories were totally unplanned:
Letting the kids follow a butterfly trail at a botanical garden for way longer than we intended
An impromptu splash party at a park fountain
Stumbling upon a live mariachi band and dancing in the street
These weren’t on the itinerary. But they were everything.
We try to always leave at least 1-2 “open” windows each day where we just go with the flow. That’s when the best stuff happens.
5. We keep it simple (especially for the kids)
We don’t present the full plan to our kids at the start of each day. That just invites disappointment when things change (because something always changes). Instead, we say things like:
“First we’re going to the aquarium, then we’ll have lunch. After that, we’ll see how everyone’s feeling.”
“We’re doing something fun this morning, and maybe something cool later if we have time.”
It keeps their expectations flexible and makes transitions easier.
Our sweet spot: Plan 60%, leave 40% open
This is our golden ratio. Enough structure to feel like the day has purpose. Enough freedom to pivot without stress. It’s the difference between running a marathon and taking a long, curious walk.
Final thoughts:
Traveling with kids can feel chaotic, unpredictable, and—let’s be honest—a little exhausting. But when we stop trying to control every moment, and instead guide the day gently, we all enjoy the trip more.
Whether we’re hitting every must-see spot or spending the afternoon feeding ducks and throwing rocks in the water, we remind ourselves:
“This is the memory.”
It doesn’t have to be perfect to be meaningful.
So yes—we plan. But we also leave space for magic.
That’s the AdventureRx way.
Want to see our real-life itineraries and flexible family planning tips in action? Stick around! We’re sharing it all—from what we pack to how we handle travel meltdowns—with zero judgment and a lot of laughs.
